Liquid Diet

Liquid diets are the devil! For someone that loves food…this is torture. All day today I am on a liquid diet. No food. No snacks. Nothing! All day that is all I see is food. Its in commercials. Its in my cabinets. Its everywhere I look. TORTURE I TELL YA!!!!!

Well….I know that there are some people out there that choose this diet purposefully. But not this girl. I love me some food. But the doc says that tomorrow I need to have another procedure. Yes I said it….another procedure.

Ever since I had the C-section I have had this weird feeling like I have air bubbles in my urethra (I feel it when I pee and after I pee). And I know the air bubbles are in my urethra and not my vajay because every time I get one…I pee a little. I know I know…TMI. But without telling you that you wont understand the difference. Well for a while after the surgery…it felt a little weird after I peed. I was blaming it on the catheter. I didn’t pee right for 4 weeks. But then after that 4 weeks it still felt a little weird. It was tender down there and I felt little bubbles. I thought to myself…maybe its still from the catheter. Then a few weeks later I decided to look it up.  And apparently bubbles in the urethra “is” a thing. I didn’t know that. I thought I was imagining the whole thing.

Apparently there can be a fistula between your bladder and vagina or the bladder and the intestines. The doc thinks that it’s a bladder/vagina fistula because of the c-section. When you have a c-section they move the bladder over to make way for the uterus. Well by moving the bladder and putting it back when the c-section is done…you apparently can put the bladder into shock or something like that and it can fuse itself to the vaginal walls. The tissues then fuse together and make a little hole. This little hole connects the bladder to the vagina….causing air bubbles.

So to find out if I have a fistula….I have to get some radiology tests done. Tomorrow I am going in for a cystogram and an IVP. Both are xrays of my kidneys down to my bladder to my urethra. And while I have these xrays they will be injecting me with contrast. And what does that mean to me you ask…..well….it means a lot. It means that I cant breast feed my baby for 2 days. WHAT!!???!!!

Not breastfeeding my baby for 2 days is a very emotional thing. Not only for her but for me. I only know this because once –way-back-when- when I was breastfeeding my son….I decided to go out and drink. And because I drank I didn’t feed him for like 12 hours or something like that. OH MAN it was torture. I would hear him cry and I would cry. It was so hard not to go to him and hold him and feed him. I wanted to console him and I couldn’t. He would smell my milk and want to eat and then freak out when he couldn’t eat. It was hard. And now I have to do it for 2 days!

Man oh man….I am going to be an emotional ball with enough tears to fill an ocean. Well we will see how it goes…..I cant wait until tomorrow…..so this can all be over.

FOOOOOOODDDDDDD……I WANT FOOOOOOOOODDDDDD!!!!

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